The diminutive Miss Lemon was daydreaming in the stuffy office of the great detective, Hercule Poirot, the windows were all closed in case germs enter the room. The fastidious Poirot always maintained they played havoc with his poor digestion. Miss Lemon knew the real problem laid in his awful diet, but you never questioned the great Poirot.
‘Ah there you are Miss Lemon, perhaps you could book me a ticket to Lewes and a room at the Shelley Hotel?’
‘A short break Hercule? I love Lewes. My Aunt lives in Seaford and we often go up for the day to rummage around the shops’
‘No Miss Lemon, I have been asked to investigate a mystery most peculiar.’
‘A murder I presume?’
‘Not in the normal sense Miss Lemon, my little grey cells have been drawn to a thoroughly vexing matter. I don’t normally deal in the murder of financial deals, but a deal has fallen through at the local football club with both of the parties involved claiming they pulled the deal.’
‘I don’t understand,’ said Miss Lemon, she did but hated football and was not interested in football or finances and hoped to curtail her employer escalating his prognosis.
But Poirot went on and removed some pieces of paper from his filing drawers.
‘A deal involving much importance and curiosity. A deal mademoiselle involving the team of the ladies’
‘A ladies team at a football club?’
‘ Oui mademoiselle. Your idea of a woman is someone who gets on a chair and shrieks if she sees a mouse. That’s all prehistoric. I digress. This was a deal Lewes FC said they were pulling out from. Of course, this is normal procedure Miss Lemon, because as both sides began to reveal their cards it seems Lewes did not want to pursue the deal further. Please take the time for me to reveal this quote from the club mademoiselle. “Lewes FC is a club that has always had community and social impact at its core. Through our discussions, we found that whilst we shared a common belief in the future growth prospects of women’s football, the structure needed to make this specific opportunity work would be too disruptive to other values that we hold dear.” It is most obvious, is it not, that in the circumstances Lewes FC have claimed their values to not align with Mercury 13 and pulled out.’
This ignited some vague interest from Miss Lemon. ‘Yes Poirot, how interesting. But surely these are the fundamental principles of the deal so why did they even pursue it. Did the club not do their homework?’
‘I think when your finances are in trouble, in England how do you say, you clutch and straws as you engage in the wishful thinking and repent at leisure’ Poirot produced a smug smile, very pleased with his cliches.
‘Desperation is the word I believe,’ With Miss Lemon’s curiosity getting the better of her she maintained her interest and began to feel impatient wishing he would get to the point..
‘So did Mercury13 challenge this point of view?’
‘On the surface this is not as vexing as you would imagine Miss Lemon. Negotiations were clearly most amicable, Mercury 13 are very wealthy and a highly professional outfit, what was there to be gained by stooping into the gutter with claims and counter claims. Like any professional outfit they waited patiently and offered a different viewpoint when they had found an alternative. See these press cuttings. Two weeks ago they bought a much bigger and better prospect Como FC by the lakes. How do you say, action speak louder words. Here is another cutting from last week in the Chronicle and I quote you Miss Lemon ‘The road has not always been smooth in Mercury/13’s fledging journey. The group was engaged in discussions to take over Lewes but ended up pulling out.’
‘Oh I see Monsieur, totally at odds with the Lewes FC claim?’
‘Seemingly so Miss Lemon. One party says they pulled out because of the values that they had ample time to discuss before taking a deal to the first stage, in depth negotiations. The other simply saying they pulled out.’
‘So who do you believe Hercule, surely it is impossible for them both to be telling the truth?’
‘But surely the impossible could not have happened, therefore the impossible must be possible in spite of appearances.’
So at this stage mon ami it is a big task to say. Reading what Mercury 13 say it would appear in FC Como they have found a complete and well run football club that has within its own means enjoyed four promotions and sought investment to continue to the next stage of their development. Whereas after protracted negotiation with Lewes FC Mercury13 realised here was a club that was the opposite. In a financial mess and without the necessary sound internal mechanisms, poor infrastructure, experience and inadequate personnel to do the same?’
‘It’s a funny old game Hercule.’
‘It is Miss Lemon. But for now can you also book a flight to Lake Como and a berth in the Hotel Exceptionnel where I replenish and rest my grey cells so we can look deeper. We are dealing with press releases. In my experience the, how do you say, devil is in the retail.’
‘Detail’ corrected Miss Lemon. She always enjoyed getting one over the great detective as much as Hercule Poirot enjoyed deliberately giving her the opportunity to do so.
‘ Indeed Miss Lemon. Remember no crime is ever solved without the solution of the motive.’
To be continued….who really pulled the deal?
The Rights of Fans. 